From the First Kiss
by poetryismyfirstlove
Summary: Modern Day AU, OOC. The decision to kiss for the first time is the most crucial one in any love story. It changes the relationship of two people much more strongly than even the final surrender; because this kiss already has within it that surrender. Emil Ludwig
1. Chapter 1 1st kiss

**The first kiss is like eating your first strawberry.**

**When you taste it, you want more.**

**-Tom Corr**

* * *

KATNISS

It wasn't the first time he kissed me nor was it the last.

I was eight when he first kissed me.

We were walking in a line during our field trip to the botanical gardens. I loved the many flowers and butterflies. They were all colorful and very pretty. I have seen primroses and katniss flowers, the plants my sister and I were named after by my hip parents.

But the place was packed and it seemed like there were couples everywhere unashamedly flaunting their love for each other. And by unashamedly I mean not suitable for kids and even grown-ups alike.

The rest of my class were whispering to each other. The more advanced kids in class called it kissing. I see my parents do it in the morning and evening when Dad goes to the office or comes home, even on special occasions. and It didn't bother me before but somehow my classmates were all buzzing because of it.

I heard one girl said kissing gave you the cooties. I didn't know what cooties were and I didn't care. But then my parents did the same although the kissing people do here was in no way like my parents. It looked like they were eating each other's face.

Gross! Maybe that's how you get cooties. I swear I'm never going to kiss anyone!

Just then one boy spoke up and broke my thought.

"That's not true! I'll prove it!" he said.

And in front of everyone, that little boy who dared disprove cooties came up to me and kissed me right on the lips. It was over just as it began like a butterfly ghosting over my lips followed by this weird fluttering in my tummy.

Oh no! cooties! I ran as fast to the teacher and told her what happened.

I told her that Peeta Mellark gave me the cooties.

* * *

PEETA

My name is Peeta Mellark and I've only ever kissed one woman in my life.

I met her when we were 8 and her family just moved in beside our house. She seemed like an ordinary girl, nothing special about her. In fact she seemed small for her age. But my parents wanted me to get to know her and her sister and play with them.

I tried but all she ever wanted to do was run. And she was quite fast, her long hair in two braids trailing behind her smelling of strawberries. All I ever did was chase her around and it was tiring.

Her little sister, Primrose, loved her dolls and was left to her own but she always followed Katniss around on her short legs.

One time Prim tripped and scraped her knee. Katniss got all concerned and cleaned her wound and put on a band-aid. She cried all the while so she sang to make her feel better. After finishing her song, Katniss kissed her knee and smiled at her widely. She stopped crying.

If I was hooked with her singing then I was a goner with her smile. How could a little girl hold a voice and a smile that could stop a kid from crying? Somehow I felt envious of Prim's knee.

That day, I swore that I'll do whatever it takes to get a kiss from Katniss Everdeen.

The opportunity appeared when our class went out on a fieldtrip in the botanical gardens. Everyone was talking about kissing and cooties that I thought about kissing her and showing the class it wasn't real.

Unfortunately, my plan backfired and Katniss told the teacher what I did. The teacher scolded me for stealing a kiss and told me that you only kiss the one you love.

I was surprised to learn this. I knew my parents kissed and that they loved each other. But is that how I felt for Katniss? Is that why I wanted to kiss her?

I felt my cheeks burn at the thought and could not look at her.

The good thing that came out of my action though was that Katniss decided to forgive me and be my friend.


	2. Chapter 2 2nd kiss

KATNISS

They used to tease us since that incident 4 years ago.

Peeta and Katniss sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G.

But then Peeta and I have moved past that and became bestfriends especially as he lived next door. We were in and out of each others houses. We always had each other's backs and we never let what other people say about us bother us.

Besides, most of my classmates now dream of kissing.

I don't.

Ever since that cooties incident, I have tried removing it from my mind. Especially as the rumor mill is spurning news that kissing makes you pregnant.

I have been hoping Peeta wouldn't get hold of that and try to disprove it. I wouldn't know what I'd do if he did.

But things have a way of happening.

It wasn't until 4 years after that he did it again.

I was a member of the school track and field team. My favorite event was the 100 meter dash. I've been religiously training all year and I was all set to win the gold for this year.

I ran as fast as my legs would carry me, faster than all the girls present; my breath coming in little puffs, my hair flying behind me in a single braid and my feet carrying me as if I were flying.

It was over in a matter of seconds. I won.

The applause was deafening and people came to me to congratulate me. I received lots of hugs and pats on my back for doing well and kisses on the cheek from my family. There was a flurry of people around me clamouring for my attention.

Then out of nowhere Peeta was in front of me smiling this huge grin looking so proud of me he'd likely burst.

And then he kissed me.

It was short just like the first one only this time there was more pressure from his soft lips. He seemed surprised that he did so.

We stood there rather awkwardly. I was feeling a little weak in the knees and blamed it on all the running I did earlier.

Did he just kiss me again?

He then smiled sheepishly and shrugged his shoulders.

"Congratulations. You were amazing!" he said.

"Thanks." I replied feeling confused. I was waiting for him to apologize or explain but he has seemed to have forgotten what he did earlier and I am not one to pry.

"No need to thank me. It's true." he said.

Peeta was not big on compliments. In fact, he has never thrown me a compliment before. So if he says I am than maybe I am.

"So see you at my house later?" I asked.

"Where else will I be?" he replied back, smiling back at me as if I were crazy to think otherwise before going ahead of me.

I smiled back at him. Maybe the kiss was just a fluke and it was best that we both ignore it. If he wouldn't bring it up then neither will I.

We are friends. Things won't change right? He was just very happy for me. There was nothing more to that.

But then friends don't kiss or do they? Are we friends who kiss?

Eww. Even in my mind that sounded dirty.

Well, at least now, I'm smart enough to know that I wouldn't get pregnant from a kiss.

* * *

PEETA

It wasn't until we were 12, when I kissed her again.

She just won her first race and she was amazing! Everyone was around her congratulating her.

I went near her, feeling proud and elated, wanting to congratulate her too. She looked flushed and happy and was smiling this huge smile. I lost thought what I wanted to say. All I remember was smiling at her and wanting to kiss her.

So I kissed her but just briefly. I was a little surprised how nice and easy it felt. But she looked taken aback.

For a moment I felt guilty and ashamed that I stole a kiss from her again. And we stood there awkwardly facing each other.

I smiled sheepishly and shrugged my shoulders. "Congratulations. You were amazing!"

"Thanks." she replied, looking confused.

"No need to thank me. It's true." I said.

"So see you at my house later?" she asked.

"Where else will I be?" I replied back, grinning.

As I walked away, I was certain that I would love to kiss her again but only if she'll let me. And I was absolutely certain of what I felt when we were 8, that I have fallen in love with Katniss Everdeen.


	3. Chapter 3 3rd kiss

KATNISS

It's been 2 years since the last time Peeta kissed me.

Not that I were counting or anything nor do I miss it. I'm just glad that he has finally rid himself of that. Finally, things are back to normal. The comfort and constancy of our friendship is all I'll ever need and want.

I should have known better not to run in the rain. But it felt good after my practice. Now I'm stuck at home feverish and with the bad case of headache and colds.

Peeta dropped by early in the morning as usual to walk with me to school but as I was sick I told him I'm staying in. He told me he'd pick up my assignments for me and share his notes so I won't miss a day of school. That was nice of him actually, I was usually the one taking down notes for the both of us.

By late afternoon, I was a little better but the headache and nasal congestion makes eating hard. My parents haven't arrived yet and I was feeling a little down that no one's at home to take care of me.

Just then, a knock came on the door and I was surprised to see who it was.

"Hey Peeta, you're early!" I was surprised and pleased at the same time, letting him in the house.

"I cut the last subject. The teacher was absent anyway. We just sat around doing nothing so I figured I'd come here." He explained.

"You didn't have to. What if you get in trouble?" I asked, worried.

"Nah! No one noticed. Here are your assignments and copies of the lectures" he said, handing them to me.

"Thank you." I said.

"It's no big deal. Besides, who's going to take care of you?" he asked.

I was touched by his care and concern for me. My thank you seemed inadequate, so I came to him and hugged him. It was the first time I was ever this close to him like this. Sure he'd occasionally hold my hand to assist me or he'd drape his arm over my shoulders sometimes when we're walking but hugging was never our thing. He seemed to understand what I couldn't say and let his hands run through my hair.

"You're worth it." I thought I heard him murmur.

Just then my stomach made itself known by growling viciously. I would have been terribly embarrassed if not for Peeta's look of concern when he broke our hug to look at me.

"Haven't you eaten yet?" he asked, though it was rather obvious.

"I don't have the appetite. I wanted soup but my parents aren't home yet and I couldn't cook with a headache."

"Okay, you could sit in the kitchen counter while I do the cooking." He said.

"Really? You know how to cook?" I asked, unaware that he could.

"I'm astounded how little faith you have in me!" he said, feigning hurt.

"You, I trust. It's your cooking that has yet to convince me." I replied back.

"Just wait and be prepared to be amazed" he said.

It was after my second bowl of his beef soup that I was thoroughly satisfied and pleased.

I looked up to him smiling.

"I know. You don't have to say it. I'm good aren't I?" he said.

"The best!" I said. "Where did you learn how to cook?"

"Food network. You sit around and watch TV and you learn a few things."

He cleaned up after I finished eating and I was watching him move easily in the kitchen. Now with a full stomach, I was getting sleepy and Peeta must have noticed.

"Come on, I'll get you to bed" he said. Before I could say anything, he lifted me and carried me to my room and deposited me in bed.

I didn't know how Peeta became this strong but I shouldn't be surprised as how I felt his body was bigger when I hugged him earlier.

He let me drink my medicine on my bedside table and tucked me in bed.

He brushed my hair from my forehead with his hands and leaned in.

I thought he was going to kiss me again, not that I was hoping for any, but I was bracing myself.

He kissed me gently on my forehead.

"Sleep well, Katniss. Hope you get well soon." He said as he left my room.

It wasn't the usual kiss he gave me, thank goodness, but it was not entirely unwelcome either. In fact this kiss seemed more intimate than the first two. It was a kiss that speaks of familiarity just like how my father did when he used to put me to bed. I felt safe and comforted.

I closed my eyes, the drug finally kicking in and dreamt of hugs and kisses on my forehead.

I wake up physically refreshed but mentally ambivalent.

Maybe not all kisses were bad.

* * *

PEETA

As we grew up, we grew closer. I have never felt the need to look at other girls and I'm sure other guys are not bothering to come close to her because of me. Still, I didn't make a move on her.

One time she got sick after getting caught in the rain. I wanted to skip class too but I know she wouldn't let me so I told her I'd get her assignments and notes. I decided to cut class early when I found out the teacher was absent so I could check on her right away.

She was surprised of my visit but I know she was glad of my presence and not just for the notes and stuff.

I was surprised that she came to me and hugged me. It was the closest physical contact we had in a while. And I know she was doing it because she was feeling vulnerable and thankful. I let my hands run through her hair which still smelled like strawberries, letting her know I'll always be here and murmured "You're worth it."

Then her stomach grumbled and I found out she hasn't eaten yet so I offered to cook for her.

Turns out she loved my cooking and I felt proud of it.

Then she became sleepy so I offered to carry her upstairs and laid her on the bed. I let her drink her medicine and tucked her in.

I brushed the hair from her forehead, hesitating at first but then I leaned in and kissed her on the forehead.

I wished her well before leaving her room. "Sleep well, Katniss. Hope you get well soon."

I wanted to kiss her badly even if she was sick and I chastised myself for even thinking about it. Not yet, I thought to myself.


	4. Chapter 4 4th kiss

KATNISS

You would think that Christmas when you're 15 is not so different from the rest of the Christmases you've had.

Maybe not; if only my parents weren't mine and Peeta wasn't my bestfriend.

It's been tradition in our family to have Peeta come over for Christmas while I skip over to their house for the New Year. I'm not sure how we started this tradition but I recall it was a mutual decision on our part that if we wanted to be bestfriends forever we'd spend holidays with each other's families.

My mother went all-out on her decorations this year. Replacing our old tree with a bigger one and draping the stairs with garland. Even our yard is sparkling with all the lights and snow present.

Dinner was fantastic. My tummy actually hurts from eating too much. We moved to the living room where we exchanged presents. I received a new book and lip gloss from my sister and a laptop from my parents.

As the night was winding down, Peeta and I decided to drink hot chocolate. We were sitting on the bottom step of the stairs, talking about the gifts we received and decided that it was a good haul this year.

I then proceeded to give him mine; a scarf that I have crocheted myself.

"There, now you have a Katniss original. I'm glad I chose blue. This will make your eyes pop and will keep you warm and toasty." I said as I fixed it around his neck.

"Thank you, Katniss. I'll wear this always" he said with a huge smile on his face.

"Well, I hope not, because you'll look foolish if you wear that in the summer" I joked.

"You know what I mean. Now it's my turn, close your eyes for my gift." he instructed me.

I closed my eyes and felt him attach something to my wrist. When I opened my eyes, I was already wearing a charm bracelet. It had a sneaker, bird, flower, bread and an arrow. I was looking at it curiously as Peeta enlightened me.

"The sneaker is because you love to run, the bird is because when you sing they stop to listen, the flower is a reminder of your namesake, the bread is so you'll remember me and the arrow means you're stuck with me." He rambled nervously.

I was touched by his gift and looked at him happily. "Thanks, I'll be sure to treasure this."

In that moment we were lost looking at each other with a happy smile on our faces. Then I started feeling awkward. What now?

"Oh look, mistletoe!" I heard my Mom say, pointing above Peeta and me.

I looked up and indeed there it was, dangling above us, mocking us with the tradition it was well-known for. I inwardly groaned.

"Well? Aren't you gonna kiss her Peeta?" My father asked.

Thanks Dad! I thought with sarcasm. Really! Is he letting a boy kiss his beloved daughter?

I looked at Peeta, all red in the face. Was he mad or embarrassed?

I looked back to my parents looking at us expectantly. Maybe they thought they were helping me with my first kiss. Well they didn't know Peeta beat them to the punch 7 years ago. If only I could tell them. I felt my own cheeks heat up as well.

"Do it already." I murmured to Peeta.

"I'm sorry, Katniss" I heard Peeta murmur as he neared his face to mine.

I closed my eyes, waiting. Then I felt warm lips brush my cheeks as light as snow but leaving me with warmth as potent as hot chocolate in winter.

I opened my eyes and was met by Peeta's blue ones.

I thought I heard my parents groan and complain that it wasn't a real kiss but they left us alone to retire to their room down the hall.

The silence was deafening. What did just happen? Did he just apologize? Why did Peeta do that? I was trying to process my thoughts about the kiss. It was different from his kiss on my lips where I was caught surprised or on my forehead where I felt safe and comforted. This kiss on my cheeks made me feel warm.

I didn't want to feel weird around him. "Say something." I urged him.

"What do you want me to say?" he asked, a smile playing on his lips.

Was he toying with me? "I don't know. Tell me anything. What are you thinking right now?" I asked.

"Merry Christmas!" he blurted.

"W-what?" I asked, confused.

"Merry Christmas, Katniss" he said, proceeding to resume drinking his hot chocolate as if nothing happened.

Okay. We've done this before. If he's not saying anything then neither will I. We finished our hot chocolates, talking about our plans for the New Year.

I saw him to the door as he was leaving, fixing the scarf on his neck.

As he turned to his house, I called out to him. "Hey Peeta!"

He turned towards me, his brows raised.

I'm not sure if kisses need to mean anything. Maybe kisses were just kisses. No need to read too much into them.

Or maybe some kisses should be taken as they are. A kiss to disprove cooties, to congratulate, to comfort and a kiss under the mistletoe just means...

"Merry Christmas"

* * *

PEETA

When we were 15, we were sitting on the step of their stairs sipping hot chocolate, and exchanged our Christmas gifts. She gave me a handmade scarf which she placed around my neck and I gave her a charm bracelet. We were smiling at each other pleased with our gifts.

Then her mother spoke up "Oh look a mistletoe!" pointing above us.

"Well? Aren't you gonna kiss her Peeta?" her father asked.

I suddenly blushed at the thought of kissing her again, and in front of her parents no less. I wonder if they knew I've kissed her twice already. I noticed Katniss blushing as well but she looked uncomfortable.

"Do it already." she murmured.

Now if I were going to kiss her again, I wanted to do it on my own terms and when she's ready for it.

"I'm sorry, Katniss" I murmured as I leaned in and watched Katniss close her eyes. And gently, I placed a kiss on her cheek.

Her gray eyes open and met mine.

Her parents complained that it wasn't a real kiss then left us alone afterwards.

I could tell that she was overanalyzing the kiss in her head. "Say something" she said.

"What do you want me to say?" I asked, playing with her.

"I don't know. Tell me anything. What are you thinking right now?" she asked.

I said the first thing that came to my mind. "Merry Christmas!"

"W-what?" she asked, confused.

"Merry Christmas, Katniss" I said, sipping my hot chocolate nonchalantly. Let her think what it means.

After we finished our drinks, she saw me to the door fixing the scarf on my neck.

As I leave for home, she called out to me. "Hey Peeta!"

I turned towards her, my brows raised as if to say "what?"

"Merry Christmas" she said and closed her door.

I smiled and I thought to myself, finally, we're getting somewhere.


	5. Chapter 5 5th kiss

KATNISS

After Christmas, things returned to normal or as almost normal as they were. Peeta and I still hang-out. I wear his bracelet and he wears my scarf. We weren't branding each other or anything. It was just a sign of our friendship.

Then I turned 16 and suddenly became a woman.

I was always thin and was an athlete but I didn't expect for my menses to come this late. I was probably the last in class to get my monthly visitor but I don't have the courage to ask the rest of the girls in class.

Crap! Menstrual cramps suck and don't even get me started on all the ickiness of blood trickling from my "you know what". The worse was when I told my mother and she and my father sat me down for "the talk".

I've never felt traumatized in my whole life even when I saw our old neighbor walking in his birthday suit. It was just too much information. I was hoping they would get better when the time comes they would need to speak to Prim. The horror!

The thing they have advised me most about was how I should act now when I am with Peeta; that since I'm a lady now, I should act demurely and avoid inappropriate behavior. Weren't they just suggesting that last Christmas?

They said that they trust him but it doesn't mean that Peeta can't act like any other boy. So I defended Peeta and told them that he's not like that and he doesn't even see me like that. Of course, I haven't told them about the kisses. But even without those kisses, if Peeta liked me he would have told me by now wouldn't he?

It was during our classmate Joanna's birthday that I attended my first high school party. She was popular in class so most of our classmates attended. Her parents weren't strict and allowed us the house for the night.

As most high school parties go, they start out innocent enough and by the end of the night, almost half the class has gotten drunk after sneaking out beer and other liquors.

We were playing spin the bottle and whoever the bottle points to will take a shot. I was unlucky enough to be chosen 8 times, 5 of which Peeta drank on my behalf aside from the 3 he already drank for himself. So by the end of the night, Peeta was pretty much hammered.

When many were already bored with the game, someone suggested a new game called "7 minutes of heaven". Say what? I wasn't familiar with the game and when I asked Joanna what it was all about. I immediately blushed.

The idea of locking yourself up in a room with a boy and then be expected to make-out or whatever for 7 minutes was appalling and unacceptable. Only to me anyway, the rest of my classmates seem to think it was a good idea. I looked at Peeta and he was sitting in a corner chair drunk and without a care.

A pair was chosen serially and was locked inside Joanna's guestroom to do whatever for exactly 7 minutes. The rest of the class went in like that and always came out appearing flushed, sometimes with smeared lipgloss or with rumpled hair and clothes, much to the delight of the waiting and teasing crowd.

I was anxious whether I would get called and prayed that I wouldn't be stuck with someone I didn't know. I was hoping on appealing to just giving him a kiss on the cheek if needed.

Suddenly my name was called and so was Peeta's. Great! By now everyone was teasing us again. Peeta and Katniss sitting on a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G! I felt them pull me and someone grabbed Peeta form his spot and we were both pushed inside the room.

Peeta sat on the floor by the foot of the bed leaning back on it with his legs outstretched. He was looking at me oddly and I was staring at him back.

"Don't just stand there, sit beside me." Peeta said and I followed, sitting beside him and hugging my knees to my chest. Crap! What happens next?

"So what do you want to do?" Peeta asked first.

"Seriously? I don't know. I didn't know things like this happen in parties. If I knew then maybe I wouldn't have come. But I'll just chalk this up to my high school experience next to drinking. Speaking of which, I'm sorry you had to drink a lot because of me. You're probably drunk now and I probably am too because I think I'm speaking too much. Am I speaking too much? I think i'm speaking too much. Woah! I suddenly feel dizzy. Are you dizzy?" I continued to babble, which Peeta stopped by pressing a finger to my lips.

"Sshhh! I'm getting dizzy. And yes, you speak too much. We don't have to do anything you know so you don't have to be nervous. We could just pretend" He said as he removed his finger slowly, leaving a trail of tingling sensation where his finger touched my lips.

"Okay" I said, agreeing with his plan. "So what do we do for the next 5 minutes?"

"I have an idea." He said as he pulled me up from the floor and onto the bed.

We laid down side by side, facing each other. I was getting sleepy and so was Peeta. My eyes fluttered close with the last image of Peeta leaning towards me.

The rest of the class later found us in bed sleeping and didn't disturb us. Weird! You'd think that after seeing the 2 of us sleeping together that they'd tease us more, turns out it had the opposite effect. As confusing as it was, they thought that Peeta and I were boring.

My only other confusion was when I woke up I felt warm breath on me and Peeta was asleep with his nose touching mine. I didn't know how to react but it was just as well because he woke up soon after, unfazed. It seemed like no big deal to him, stretching his arms complaining of a hang-over and urging me to move so we can go home before our parents ground us.

Even if his lips haven't touched me again, I wasn't that stupid not to know that it was an Eskimo kiss.

Now I'm back to thinking, do all these kisses ever mean anything to him?

* * *

PEETA

Both of us attended Joanna's 16th birthday bash. We played spin the bottle and I had to take some of her shots for her. At the end of the game, I was already feeling drunk. I decided to sit down for a while and rest.

Suddenly, I felt someone pull me up, pushing me inside a room with someone. And the crowd, being rowdy cheering seven minutes in heaven. I sat on the floor by the bed and noticed it was Katniss with me. My eyes must have bugged out of my head.

Never in my dreams have I pictured us pairing up to make-out. So okay, maybe I have, but I never wanted for it to be a game.

"Don't just stand there, sit beside me." I said and she followed, sitting beside me.

"So what do you want to do?" I asked.

"Seriously? I don't know. I didn't know things like this happen in parties. If I knew then maybe I wouldn't have come. But I'll just chalk this up to my high school experience next to drinking. Speaking of which, I'm sorry you had to drink a lot because of me. You're probably drunk now and I probably am too because I think I'm speaking too much. Am I speaking too much? I think i'm speaking too much. Woah! I suddenly feel dizzy. Are you dizzy?" she babbled, which made me dizzy and I stopped her by pressing a finger to her lips.

"Sshhh! I'm getting dizzy. And yes, you speak too much. We don't have to do anything you know so you don't have to be nervous. We could just pretend" I said as I removed my finger slowly from her lips, wanting my own to touch them. I don't want to pressure her into doing something she doesn't want.

"Okay. So what do we do for the next 5 minutes?"

"I have an idea." I pulled her up from the floor and onto the bed.

We laid down side by side, facing each other. I watched her grow sleepy. I leaned in rubbing my nose to hers.

Soon, I thought to myself, giving in to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6 6th kiss

KATNISS

It has been several months since Joanna's birthday. I haven't talked to Peeta yet, nor did he try anything more on me.

I actually feel relieved.

I don't do well during confrontations and I don't want to assume about him having feelings for me. He might not actually like me and I'd only embarrass myself. It's also not because I like him back as more than a friend. I know that he is too important for me to lose over some hormonal glitch, that being the reason why I must be feeling this way or maybe his case too.

Damn these teenage hormones! But the most I am afraid of is that he does like me and I don't know what to do after that.

I'm afraid I might hurt him.

* * *

It was the start of track season. By now, I have already accumulated medals from different events. But the 100 meter dash was still my favorite event.

I lined up with the rest of the runners, eyes fierce with determination, fixed on the finish line up ahead.

At the sound of the gun, we're all off and it's a blur of colors as I fly by. I was getting close but next thing I knew, I twisted my left ankle and felt immense pain as I landed on the field.

I know accidents happen but it sucked that I had to lose.

I was last to leave the locker room, having spent my time crying in the shower. My eyes must look puffy and red.

I was stepping on my left foot gently after bandaging it, not really placing any weight on it. If I walked slowly enough, it's bearable and would make me reach home before midnight. I was thinking of calling my parents to pick me up when I saw Peeta waiting for me outside.

One look at me and he knows I'm sad, devastated even. He opens his arms and I walk into them. I'm reminded of the day I got sick and he took care of me. He's doing it again for me.

His arms were wrapped loosely around me, stroking my hair. He kept on telling me that I was still amazing and there was always a next time. I pressed my face on his chest near his shoulder, relishing this comfort. By doing so, his face slipped between the junction of my shoulder and neck. This close I could feel his every breath fanning my neck. It tickled so I moved and felt his lips graze my neck.

It was fleeting but it was enough to unhinge me. A tingling sensation spread from my neck down to my fingers and toes. Peeta didn't seem to mind what just happened.

But I did.

Damn these teenage hormones!

* * *

PEETA

It was painful to see Katniss lose. I knew she must be feeling devastated so I waited for her.

When she stepped out from her locker room looking defeated, I opened my arms to hug her and she went in.

I let my arms wrap around her loosely afraid to reveal myself too much. I stroked her hair and reassured her that she was still amazing and there was always a next time.

She pressed her face to my chest near my shoulder but by doing so, my face slipped between the junction of her shoulder and neck. She smelled like baby soap and strawberries. I felt awkward and thrilled at the same time. My breathing hitched and I feel my heart pound crazily. I have to remind myself to keep my mind out of the gutter. Think of dog poop, men's locker room, toe nails.

Still, I would not be the first to break from this position.

Then she moved and I slipped further, my lips grazing her neck. Shit! I fixed our position quickly so I was holding her to my chest.

I thought to myself, really soon.


	7. Chapter 7 Last 1st kiss

Last 1st kiss

**When he kisses you he isn't doing anything else. **

**You're his whole universe... and the moment is eternal **

**because he doesn't have any plans and isn't going anywhere. **

**Just kissing you...it's overwhelming.**

**-Anon**

KATNISS

By 18, I could pretty much say that most of my classmates are already experts in sucking faces, swapping spit and then some.

Still, I wasn't getting into any of that and neither will Peeta, he told me.

I wonder why but I was kind of glad that his kissing days are over. Not that I only want him to kiss me. It's ridiculous to think of kissing him again.

I guess I was just selfish in a way that I didn't want him doing things I didn't want to do myself. I didn't want to be left out.

It was our school dance; just another reason for most people to get excited about, another reason for them to go about kissing.

Peeta and I came to the dance together. Him in a tuxedo and me in a green flimsy dress my mother picked.

We didn't bring dates as we made a pact when we were 12 that if we were to attend a dance we'd go with each other to save the other from embarrassment of not finding any date. Good thing too because I was uncomfortable with some of the guys who asked me out and Peeta complained of the girls who asked him being vapid and shallow.

The dance committee did a great job decorating the gym. There were paper lanterns and fairy lights and glitter seemed to hang everywhere in the air. The food was as expected not the best but the music was well-chosen.

Peeta and I did not stick to each other the whole night. We danced in groups and with other people. But as the night went on, the songs became slower, the lights were dimmer and people started to divide in pairs.

Eventually, Peeta and I were left in each other's company. I felt awkward and out of place and was heading for the sidelines when Peeta took hold of my hand.

"Dance with me?" he asked as the next slow song played.

I let him lead me to the dance floor. I placed both my hands on his shoulders while he placed his hands on my waist. We were never good dancers and I hoped no one would notice. I remembered the last time we were close and I could almost feel a blush creeping on my cheeks.

The silence was crowding me and the song that was playing did not help matters.

_We might have met as children  
Maybe it's been a couple weeks  
I don't even know anymore  
You have that affect on me_

Not to focus too much on the song I tried to make small talk. "Have I told you that you clean–up nicely?"

"Thanks. But I'm nowhere near you. I thought I'd never see the day you'd wear a dress." he taunted.

"My mom picked it." I said. I was feeling shy. I've always been a jeans kind of girl but as the occasion is a dance, I can't wear my usual attire. But I was glad that the awkwardness seem to have dissipated.

"Then I have to thank your Mom for making you look more beautiful. Green suits you. It just might be my favorite color now." he said teasingly.

More beautiful? Does that mean he thought I was beautiful before? "And I thought you loved orange" I teased back.

"Well, that's not all I love." he said.

What? Did I hear right? I was staring at him unsure what he meant. So much for conversation, awkward is back and we were once again drowned by silence, dancing slowly, moving in circles.

But this time, somewhere between the dance and the cheesy slow song and the air littered with glitters, I felt like I was seeing Peeta in a different light.

_And I wonder what you're thinking  
Whenever you're not around  
Any secret I was keepin'  
I wanna tell you right now_

_And when I dream about tomorrow  
I've got you on my mind  
I am hopelessly devoted  
Just want you in my life_

For the first time, I didn't mind that we weren't talking; that the crowd has melted away and the music has died down in the background and all I can sense is his hands on my waist and his eyes on me. I didn't question why it felt right to be in a Peeta's arms, like it was made for me; like it was where I was supposed to be.

For the first time, he was looking at me something close to how my father looks at my mother. I didn't know that I would ever feel happy to have someone looking at me like I was perfect, like I was his dream come true.

And if someone told me that the universe must have conspired to bring this moment about, I would believe them.

"I hope you won't be surprised this time, but I just had to try again." he said, his voice thick with longing and earnestness.

"Try what?' I asked my breath catching, although I think I already knew.

He leaned in and tentatively touched his lips to mine, softly at first, and when I didn't pull back, firmly and with the sweetest pressure.

The pull in my tummy has returned, as well as the weakening of my knees. Both of which I have dismissed before as some symptom of cooties or probably from running. Then I felt that warmth again on my cheeks from last Christmas and even a tinge of the comfort and safety from when I was sick.

All those old feelings came rushing in plus more. I feel light-headed as if I was floating and tiny tingles have erupted in the tips of my fingers and toes and warmth is spreading throughout my chest.

I know now that this kiss is different. It was so much more than just a chemical reaction, more than your average teenage hormones.

Because for some reason this kiss reminded me of the kisses they have in fairytales; The kind that wakes up Snow White and Sleeping Beauty, that turns frogs into princes and princesses into ogres.

It was the kiss that stirs up possibility and gives hope for a happily ever after.

I know he has kissed me twice on the lips before and then some but for all intents and purposes, I would argue that this was our first.

I know no other kiss would ever compare.

And as Peeta prolonged the kiss, I did what I have never done before.

* * *

PEETA

We attended the school dance together just like we promised. We did not stick to each other the whole night, mingling and dancing with other people. But as the night went on, we were left in each other's company.

"Dance with me?" I asked her as a new slow song started.

I placed both my hands on her waist as her hands were on my shoulders. We started to sway rather awkwardly. She seemed tense and I actually feel relieved she was as nervous as I was. I don't even know if we should talk while we dance.

"Have I told you that you clean–up nicely?" she asked, braving to speak first and break the silence.

"Thanks. But I'm nowhere near you. I thought I'd never see the day you'd wear a dress." I taunted her, relaxing a little.

"My mom picked it." she explained timidly.

"Then I have to thank your Mom for making you look more beautiful. Green suits you. It just might be my favorite color now." I teased her, glad that we are able to banter.

"And I thought you loved orange" she teased back.

"Well, that's not all I love." I said. Did that just slip from my lips? I was mentally panicking but I acted nonchalant. She looked confused and I don't know if she caught on with my meaning.

But then conversation stalled again after my gaffe, silence fell upon us and we were again lost to our thoughts.

I noticed the lights just hitting her right, highlighting her gray eyes. I could picture myself holding her like this everyday for the rest of my life. I have never been more in love with her as I am now. I wonder what she was thinking.

Oddly enough, I caught up with the song's lyrics.

_What I'm trying to say  
In my own simple way  
Is I want you to be my last first kiss  
I want you to be my last first kiss  
I want you to be my last first kiss_

What are the odds that the universe is trying to tell me something?

"I hope you won't be surprised this time, but I just had to try again."

"Try what?" she asked in a breathy whisper.

I leaned in, pressing my lips to hers, gently at first and when she didn't pull back, I was encouraged and kissed her with all my heart has to offer.

I don't know if she feels for me the way I feel for her.

But as I kissed her, I got my answer.

_My heart, yes it's finally found  
My heart, yes it's finally found  
Someone I can't live without_

She kissed me back.

_Last First Kiss by Ron Pope_


	8. Chapter 8 Not the last kiss

KATNISS

There were many more kisses after that dance, and Peeta proved more than adequate in showing me. I'd say he relishes in the opportunity to show me each and every time. Only this time, I was always a willing participant.

But it was another 6 years after when we shared another life-changing kiss.

A kiss in front of God and in front of our friends and family, the kiss that binds us together as husband and wife.

I love him and he loves me.

I asked him if he knew this would happen when he kissed me that day when we were eight, and all the other times he did even before we were officially together.

"Do you really not know?" he asked.

He looked at me and in those blue eyes I saw _always_.

"Because you only kiss the one you love."

I smile, content with his answer.

Deep down, I always knew that from the first kiss, I was already a goner.

PEETA

Its official she is mine as I am hers. I could kiss her anytime I want to.

She asked me if I knew this would happen.

"Why did you kiss me that day when I thought you gave me the cooties? And what about those other times you kissed me when we were just friends?"

"Do you really not know?" I asked.

She looked at me expectantly.

"Because you only kiss the one you love."

She was my first and last, as I am hers. From the first kiss, I knew I couldn't do better than her.

She smiles, and just like the first time I knew I wanted to kiss her.

In fact, I never want to stop kissing Katniss.

So I do just because I want to.

Because I can.

Because I love her.

**At the first kiss **

**I felt something melt inside me  
that hurt in an exquisite way,  
all my longings, all my dreams and sweet anguish,  
all the secrets that slept deep within me came awake,  
everything was transformed and enchanted **

**and made sense.**

**~Hermann Hesse**


End file.
